Occasionally I get messages from well meaning individuals informing me my bondage is wrong. I’ve tied the wrong style of body harness or used the wrong knot, I’m reliably informed. The model would look better if she were tied “this way” rather than “that”.
I could get upset by these messages and see them as an affront to my style or the many years spent learning and experimenting. I could run into a corner and weep uncontrollably, vowing never to tie a woman on camera again. I could pile into the individual, call them out on social media and mock them for any weakness displayed.
I choose to do none of these things because it doesn’t matter.
On camera bondage is a form of self expression. It allows me to create something that I’ve enjoyed putting together and enjoy sharing. In private it’s a means to restrict and control my submissive, an enjoyable part of my dominance over her and her submission to me.
There are times when I look at an image and realise I made a mistake. Or I’ll curse myself for not using a different tie in a particular position. That’s me being self-critical. I’m allowed to do it.
There are also times too when someone will critique an image and offer constructive feedback on how a shift in lighting might have helped or some such technical comment that helps me to learn as a photographer.
Being able to filter the constructive criticism from the “I wouldn’t do it that way” comments is something I think we could all benefit from.
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