22 Different ways to use a traffic cone as part of a BDSM scene

The next time you’re stuck in roadworks don’t despair. Those pesky plastic traffic cones that litter lanes and block off exits have many practical uses in the dungeon, playroom or just BDSM life in general. Here are 22 different ways that you can put a traffic cone to good use on your submissive or slave:

#1. Hit them.

This is obvious, but worth a laugh. Grasp by the cone by the thin end, take a big swing and wallop! A massive amount of energy is transferred and it makes one amazing percussion play implement. Your submissive will not sit down for a couple of days!

#2. Put it on their head and send them to the naughty corner.

It kind of looks like a dunce’s hat, so why not use it that way. In the corner with a few choice words to remind them how bloody stupid they’ve been.

#3. Dildo in the end and make them take it all!

Many traffic cones have a hole in the end so a warning lamp or sign can be inserted. Instead of that choose a dildo, fix it in place and hold a competition to see how far down they can go. Works with both boys and girls.

#4. Sit on it.

Not them, you. Turn it upside down, put a cushion on the base and lord it over them. The fact that you’ll be slightly off balance will only cause them to marvel at your poise as you demand they serve you from this improvised throne.

#5. Sit them on it.

Don’t bother with the cushion, just get them to sit down and try and balance while you slap, punch and kick them. Not as easy as it looks and as well as the bruises from the beating they will also have a lovely mark around their arse.

#6. Try a little CBT.

Remember the hole on the top? If you’ve got a male slave get him to place his penis and balls through the hole (hard work and it will hurt as the edges of the hole are rarely smooth). When he’s done it, challenge him to take his hands and feet off the floor. Nice and painful and a lovely red mark to remind him of the day!

#7. Splitting bondage.

Tie their hands behind their back with a loose couple of winds, then do the same with their elbows. Then insert cone and start pushing down. It will take the slack out of the rope pretty quickly. By the way, this is a variation of the wedge torture where the wedges are driven in until the bones break. I don’t recommend doing that.

#8. The mother of all gags.

If you’ve got one of the smaller ones nip the end off to get your hole and then fix it in the sub’s mouth with some rope or tape or whatever comes to hand. Great thing is not only are they gagged, any noises they make become hilariously amplified by the cone. Feel free to laugh at them.

#9. While you’re at it, a bit of watersports.

So while the gag is in there undo the fly and point the todger at the cone. Yes, you have your own special urinal with none of the splashback.

#10. Target practice.

Place cone on head. Collect a handful of rope loops. Toss loops onto cone. Question is whether you make the slave stand still and smack him in the face every now and then or laugh as you make her dance around trying to catch your (deliberately) badly aimed shot. A couple of turns of the cane for each missed hoop should help.

#11. While we’re on the subject of targets…

if you’re into messy play have the sub position the cone so that the hole is above an appropriate body part and then let rip with the custard, baked beans, treacle or whatever takes your fancy. Laugh yourself silly as you watch the goo slowly wind its way down onto the slave’s body with absolute precision.

#12. Get them to make love to it.

Remember the hole? How damned funny is it to watch them make out with a cone. French kiss as a lovely prelude to popping their traffic cone cherry courtesy of the hole in the end.

#13. Dribble time.

Depending on how they do it not a lot of men are going to be able to clear the end. So when they’re done get them to lie on their back, open their mouth and watch the slow-motion action as their cum dribbles into whatever part of their body you damn well please.

#14. It’s plastic and it melts.

No, don’t set fire to it and let the plastic dribble on them – that’s stupid. Instead get them to place the cone with the thin end in the ground, strip and place their clothes inside and THEN light it. Extra points if they’re in a public place or close to a dogging site.

#15. A touch of public humiliation.

You know that subbie who always wants to be humiliated in public? Get them to strip naked, put a cone over their privates and run through the middle of town. They’re unlikely to get more than a warning from the cops and could be tomorrow’s YouTube sensation in the channel called “Stupid things people do when they’re drunk.”

#16. Speaking of drinking …

Plug the end, fill with water and see how much the stupid fuck can drink before their bladded explodes. OK, maybe not explode, but the threat of having to drink a fair few litres of water is enough to remind them just whose body they happen to be living in.

#17. While we’re on the subject of public humiliation.

Send them off into town with the cone and the mission to place it on a specific statue at a particular time. Lie in wait. When the time comes make sure you shout very loudly and draw as many people’s attention to what they’re up to as possible. Best done if they’re wearing something ridiculous at the time.

#18. Buy the cone a drink.

Send the slave off into the pub with the cone in their hand and their phone connected to you. Now you get to order the drink you want through your sock puppet. Only don’t make it easy. Keep changing your mind and remind the slave they have to address all their comments and questions to the cone.

#19. Tie them to it.

A simple one. Just tie them to the cone so their arms and legs are wrapped around it. They’ll get to know it intimately, and if you leave the cone on the motorway where you found it you’ll have hours of fun. Until they get hit by a truck. So don’t do that unless they really annoyed you.

#20. The “don’t scratch it” collar.

Requires a bit of work, but cut the end off the cone and make a slit in it so you can work your slave’s head into it, then tape it nice and tightly shut. Restricted vision and hearing, plus the tremendous feeling of being a dick await the hapless submissive.

#21. Chastity.

If you’re concerned your slave might be playing with their balls without permission some KY jelly (other lubricants are available) will see their genitals squeezed through the hole in the end. With a fair few inches of plastic jutting out in front of them it is highly unlikely that any unauthorised masturbation will be taking place.

#22. Puppy play time.

You need four for this. Bind wrists to upper arms and ankles to upper thighs. Pop their elbows and knees into the thick ends and see how far they can get on their improvised stilts. Help them along a bit by using a fifth cone to paddle their backside (see #1).

This took me about 15 minutes to come up with one insomnia induced evening.

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About Razz

I'm a creative dominant type with a love of BDSM and fetishism. This blog is an outlet, so don't take anything you see or read too seriously.

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