We call it sack time. It's a form of stress relief where Tinky puts me in a tight leather sack, leaves me to stew for half an hour, then plays with me until I can't take any more. During the long climb back to our normal kinky selves it's been a welcome release as it demands little from her. She can play the service top to the level she's comfortable with.
There's a feature of this play that makes it all the more powerful for me. Once I'm strapped up, she takes my cock out and leaves it in the open. She's done this for months without asking why, until curiosity got the better of her.
The simple answer is it makes me feel vulnerable.
Someone put my balls on the outside
When natural selection was working its magic, a bizarre trait formed that spread throughout the mammals. Sperm, it decided, should be kept at a temperature slightly lower than the rest of the body. That meant isolating it, moving it outside the body and putting it in sensitive, dangly sacks.
Whole genres of porn and BDSM have come about that exploit this quirk of nature. Cock and ball torture (or teasing if your dominant is more sensual), ball busting, cock bondage and a host of other practices have been absorbed into BDSM play. Each uses the male's genitals as way to control, dominate or just inflict good-old-fashioned pain.
During my youthful submissive days this was the one form of play that got to me. I could take beatings and humiliation. Anal probes and watersports I took in my stride. Come for my genitals and it was a whole different kettle of fish.
They were there, hanging outside my body and oblivious to all the mental tricks I'd learnt to absorb punishment. They've been poked, prodded, slapped, tied and covered in pegs and wax. I've screamed and begged for it to stop. I've been sent away with bruised balls and bleeding penis. Then I've gone back for more.
With Tinky it's different
She's not naturally dominant and what she does is a safe way to service a peculiar need of mine to give up control. She edges and slaps, punches and pinches. Her skill and confidence is improving session by session.
There's something more than the thrill of having my genitals played with. More powerful than the being vulnerable and completely at her mercy.
In a strange way that only kinky people might understand, gifting her my genitals in this way may be the purist expression of trust and love imaginable.