A letter to my neighbours: I am a rubberist. Don’t panic.
Dear Neighbours, There is nothing to be afraid of. I am just a rubberist. It means I get sexually excited by wearing latex and being with people who wear it too. It does not mean I am going to attack your children. Or ritually slaughter your cat. Nor rape you whilst you sleep in your […]
Preparing for a night out in fetish land
I’ll spend weeks building up to it. I keep telling myself “I’m going to wear the catsuit, I’m going to wear the catsuit.” The night comes. I eat dinner. I look in the mirror. OK, I’m wearing the jeans and loose shirt…
Dominants suffer from depression too
Dominants are strong, powerful people. We’re in control all of the time. We’ve a sharp mind and an inherent ability to read and understand the needs of our submissives. At least that’s the common view. The reality is that we’re as fragile as the rest of humanity. Of course we’re self-assured and confident to the […]
Review: wearing a gas mask when you have a stinking cold
There’s a long standing joke about using a gas mask when you have a cold in order to protect everyone else. I figured I’d give it a try. It didn’t go well. First up: sneezing. Not a good experience, especially if (like me) your colds tend to involve streaming runny noses and gooey, sticky mucus. […]
The frustration of the secret fetish
When you have a fetish living with someone vanilla can be soul destroying. Keeping an integral part of your sexuality will eat away at your being.
I know, I’ve been ignoring my fetish (again)
The past few months have been hard for me. The UK’s decision to leave the EU has had a profound and quite damaging impact on my business, which I’ve been struggling to cope with. I got locked into a downward spiral that no amount of hard work could pull me out of. One of the […]
I am me and no more
I was reflecting on a conversation with a potential girlfriend a couple or more years ago. Having initially said she loved my photography and thought I was very talented and poured much praise on me I was told that a condition of our “being together” would be that I would have to stop. Excuse me? My […]
Dear Dominants: you do need to impress potential slaves
“Do you need to impress slaves?” It was a question posed in one of the forums that I follow. A Dominatrix was commenting on how she was finding it difficult to find quality slaves, and how her image was putting people off. Her theory was that as a Mistress it was the responsibility of submissives […]
“Stop trying to steal my slaves!”
In the cut-throat world of Twitter BDSM, a professional dominatrix can take offence when others move in on her slaves. Best not to get to ranting though.
Can the “dick pic” ever be defended?
A photo of someone's genitals is not a welcome sight first thing in the morning. Before you send one to that girl or guy you fancy - stop!
A Dominant’s guide to dealing with the press (part 2: photographs)
With the mainstream media showing more interest in BDSM, it's important to understand how to supply images for press stories.
Avoiding rope burns in bondage
Rope burns are not an inevitable part of bondage. If you're careful and thoughtful there's no reason to burn or mark your submissive. Here's how.